Personal development is something we all need to grow into a better person. It is what helps us flourish in life. This takes time and a lot of patience. Nonetheless, we all know that some of us struggle to get started with personal development, and we want answers on how to overcome it. There are two main challenges in personal development. Let's find out!
The first is rejection. It means feeling left out, unwanted, unappreciated, not being good enough or feeling like an outcast. Rejection is very difficult for people to handle because it is the deepest human desire to be loved and appreciated. When we get rejected, we usually feel like we have done something wrong or we are not good enough. We feel a wave of guilt, sadness, delinquency, and most importantly we feel like a failure or a disappointment. Because of this, we lose that motivational drive and the thought to keep going in many aspects of our life. We give up! So, what can we do? To accept and embrace rejection, we need to view it differently.
Firstly, we should not be afraid of rejection because it builds us. Many successful people go through a lot of rejections; that's why they have become so successful. They are able to forget the past and move on; they don't let rejection define who they are, therefore we should do the same. The owner of “Rejection Therapy” website and CEO of Wuju Learning, Jia Jung, says, “Don't let rejection define you; let the reaction after that rejection define you.” This means instead of feeling we are not good enough because we were rejected or we failed, we should think what we can change, improve or do differently.
Secondly, we should also keep in mind that when facing rejection, we should view it positively. Don't think rejection is a bad thing. Think of rejection as an opportunity for improvement. For example, if you get rejected for a job, you want to focus on the skills you need to learn as opposed to feeling bad that you are not good enough that’s why you didn’t get that job.
Thirdly, it can also be a reflection of others’ fears and insecurities and wanting to feel better by rejecting us. Don't always believe that the problem is in you. We should know ourselves better than anyone else so why take other’s comments so seriously? People who are not interested or invested in our growth and success don’t have to be a part of our lives.
With this level of awareness in mind, we can slowly learn to not only manage rejection but also embrace it.
The second is the lack of mental strength. Personally, this is something crucial to achieve personal development. Mental strength means how resilient and confident we are when our life throws a curveball at us. Someone said, “Strength doesn’t come from what you can do; it comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t.” Mental strength is a bit difficult to achieve because it requires us to constantly put ourselves out of our comfort zone, face our fears/failures and stay focused and committed. There are a couple of things we can do to get started.
1. Create good daily habits: This can include exercising, reading/listening/watching that is positive, spending quality time with loved ones, visualizing a successful future-you and taking small but consistent steps towards your goals. The keyword is “daily”.
2. Practice good thoughts: Something that we all need to get out of our heads is having unhealthy beliefs of ourselves. We have to consciously counter unhealthy beliefs with healthy ones. How?
Avoid comparing yourself to another person. Just compare with the person you were yesterday.
Keep learning, applying, and growing.
Be kind and respectful to yourself. Never criticize yourself in your mind.
And finally, don’t let others tell your how smart or dumb you are – you decide and define that!
Doing all the above will slowly build our mental strength, making it easier to grow into the best version of ourselves . It takes time and patience, but we know the results are worth it.
Overall, embracing rejection and strengthening our minds are the keys for personal development. We must always aim to become a better person, both physically and mentally. Over time, we will definitely see the change: we are more confident; we are more focused; we are way happier. We have one life, let’s make it worth it!